How to Become Creepy

Hey guys!

How was your valentine's day?
Last year I posted about valentine's day and how it is all about marketing scheme and we are all victims of marketing master minds.

But I still love valentine's day. I just like festivities in general. Or just excuses to consume alcohol perhaps.

ANYWAYS, today I am going to write about ways to become creepy.
There are creepy people everywhere I realized.
But then, it got me thinking, "what exactly defines creepy for me?"
So I went through my memories and thought about some creepy people I have encountered and before and tried to dissect the Creepy-ness, in my 20 minutes of bath time I just had. So this guide is probably going to be quite incomplete but hey, what was ever complete in my past blog posts, what the heck.
So here we go!

1. Completely believe that you are totally desirable by everyone and act as if you are doing people favor by showing you are also interested in them. 
 - What does it mean? It's easy. Believe that the person you are hitting on (or harassing them) are also totally in love with you, without any plausible evidence. What? He/she looks like they are denying you? No, no, no way. They are just shy. Keep doing that, no worries. They are getting red-faced... ohhhh maybe you are turning them on too. Yikes for creeps!

2. Be obsessive about someone in "out-of-norms" manner.
- It's hard to define what out-of-norms are. But maybe something like, collecting his/her strings of hair and keep them into your wallet like a lucky charm. Or steal their dirty sock (somehow) and sleep with it, next to your face. Or go through their trash and re-chew the gum that they chewed and spat out. Yes, it's kinda like a cult. Of course, you can do all these things in a secretive or non-secretive, or perhaps the most difficult semi-secretive manner. Semi-secretive manner is that you are not doing these acts in broad daylight for everyone to notice, but just bold enough so that the person of your obsession sorta realizes. Way to go!

3. Make us think (imagine) what you are thinking (imagining) about, when you are imagining something that should probably be kept as a secret. 
- Perhaps somewhat similar to the first one. Yeah tell us your dirty fantasy. Tell us about OUR baby's name, though we only spoke to each other only once before. Tell us how you want to put life-size dolls that look like us which you can talk to and eat with everyday. That's pretty damn creepy (wink).

4. Be obsessed with violence. 
- Everyone likes a little bit of violence. We are human. It's our nature. But no, BE OBSESSED. Like your daily morning routine should include watching a horror (really gory kind) movie just to get you started. When you watch it, you shouldn't be able to help but smile watching all that blood and disfigured corpses.  And of course, be so obsessed that you tell everyone that you one day want to try the movie scene yourself. When you tell that to people, don't forget to look dazed, to slightly smile, to use really low or hyper voice, to make your lips tremble with excitement, and to describe in details how you would. That's out of the world creepy. Maybe more like dangerous. You might have people calling cops on you. That's the down-side.

5. Look dirty and proactively approach people in a really uncomfortable way
- Get your hair greasy. Wear some dirty clothes. Don't brush your teeth or wash your face. Approach people panting. Stand to them really close, as you are panting. With the stereotype "creepy-ness" so deeply imprinted in us through media, this is an easy way for you to get labeled as "that creepy person."

These are all I could come up with during my 20 minutes bath time. It may not have covered all the qualities of creepy-ness, I think practicing these will definitely get ME to think that you are creepy.

I think definition of creepy differs from person to person. I don't immediately think of a physically unattractive guy hitting on a girl at a bar as "a creepy guy." It's when he is completely in belief that the girl is loving it though she is saying "fuck off" that makes him "creepy" to me. Or I don't immediately think of a girl stalking a guy on facebook being creepy. It's when she prints out all the conversation history on his facebook wall and make it into a book so that she can read every night that makes me kind of label her as "creepy."

It's all subjective right. It's all subjective and a very obscure line. We all are creeps in some ways or others. We all fantasize or do things that you may not want everyone in the world to know.

But, it comes out creepy to me when people are in utter belief that other people totally agree or approves whatever you do / say / think. Maybe it is a combination of ignorance and self-centeredness mixed in with adult desires that create creepy-ness... Still can't put my finger on it.

What is YOUR definition of creepy?

Why I stopped Blogging

Ya'll probably wondering why I haven't updated my blog for the longest time.

What? I know you Yuri you are just plain lazy rotten little thing...?


Well... I got no excuse... I'm sorry....

BUT HEY!!!! I GOT NEWS!!

I STARTED WORKING!!!!!!!!! wheeeeee!!!

What? That's still not good reason to stop blogging.??

With all respects, you know WHAT, you're right. I'm so rotten.


But really I started working, like really working, like wake up at 7:30 am in the morning and come home at 6:30 pm in the evening working, I realized how EXHAUSTING real work is. DAMN IT.

Now I miss my 4 months long bum life terribly!!!

But the real problem with me blogging is that my blog is way too frigging long.

WAY TOO LONG. I WRITE TOO MUCH.

SHUSH YURI SHUSH! STOP TALKING AND SHUT UP!

but all these words come up and I just can't stop once I start writing.
Hence, I stopped blogging cause it's just gonna disrupt my sleep.

SO, from now on, I will try to cut down on my blabber and condense my contents...

BUT IT'S SO HARRRRRRDDDDD. see? all I wanted to say in this post was,
"i'm sorry i stopped blogging. it's because i'm too wordy and lazy."

there you have it.

my blog is going to be like that from now on. although quite unlikely.
if you would like shortened version on my blabber follow me at

yuriistweeting on twitter.


but twitter requires me more thinking that blogging. how ironic.

but a french mathmatician called Blaise Pascal  once said in his letter,

"I would have written a shorter letter, but I did not have the time."

It takes so much more time and effort to write short and concisely eh?

Wait.... does that mean I'm without effort and too dumb....???

WHATEVER BLAISE.

see you next post in... a few days.... I promise.... this time....

you lucky people.

HELLO YOU LUCKY READERS.

Why lucky? 

Because you got 2 posts in one day.

That's a miracle.

You don't get 2 posts in the same day on Yuri's blog.

OH BY THE WAY

I just started twitter so if you.... just IN CASE you wanted to follow me, my twitter name (is that what you call?) is yuriistweeting 

SO ORIGINAL RIGHT?

I wanted to be "yuriisontwitter" but apparently it was already taken. Fascinating. 

I really have nothing much to tweet about but I gave into the peer pressure and the temptation to look "cool and trendy."

.... I KNOW WHAT YOU ARE THINKING.

'YURI YOU ARE SO BEHIND THE GAME, JUST LIKE WHEN YOU STARTED THIS STUPID BLOG."

well.... I know I'm actually just a tech deaf trying to keep up but just a loser who is unable to do so... 

whatever. bite me.

that's all.

Somebody please explain to me.

Why Troy Davis was executed?

Yes,I know everyone's sick of this topic and I am just here to write another entry like EVERYONE ELSE to cry out the injustice of this messed up world.

No but really, why?

For anyone who's taken basic law class, which I did when I was in college (although it was business law class, it also covered basic criminal laws), there is a term called "reasonable doubt" when somebody is being tried. It's one of the fundamental rules in criminal laws, well, at least that's how I perceived.

And? How was Davis executed "beyond reasonable doubt?" After 7 out of 9 witnesses flipped their stories? And when there was no physical evidence present? And when some witnesses named another guy as the real murderer? When most witnesses confessed that they were pressured by police?

And all these claims were dismissed as "it was too late" and without "substantive claim of innocence?"




REALLYYYY????? REALLY????? HOW????


Yes, maybe some years passed when these witnesses flipped stories. But 7 out of 9???? And did these prosecutors and justices think these witnesses have forgotten or developed Alzheimer that the new claims were bogus or not "substantive" enough????




And after all these organizations and public figures and millions of people protested against
so-obviously-not-legally-justified sentence, the Georgia state still had the authority to kill this man, who was potentially innocent.





I would like to know, what kind of legal loop hole this is.


Troy Davis, we would never know now whether you were truly innocent now.
If you were, I am so sorry and please rest in peace.

Driver's License Boot Camp.

That's right, you heard me. I said I would talk about it in last post.

Driver's License Boot Camp.

Did I just hear a loud "HUH??" from you?

Well, I don't blame you. Not this time.

Even if you live in Japan for a long time, if you are not really part of local community (for various reasons, maybe you are foreigners, went to American schools, etc etc), you might not know the existence of this camp. Hell, if you have never lived in Japan, you would probably never understand this concept from just the name of it.


It's pretty straight forward though.
It's a camp for those people who want to learn how to drive.

That's all!!! See you guys til next post!!!......

What? Too simple? Explain more?
Ay fine. I will do, since I promised that I would...

okaaaaayyy. So some of you may know, in Japan, to get a driver's license is quite lengthy and expensive. Pretty much everyone who is a first timer needs to go to driving school to learn how to drive in school's property with this special car that has sub-brake and sub-accelerator in the passenger seat. All the while you are practicing, instructor is sitting next to you the whole time.
You will also have to take classes to learn all these rules of driving and also some ethic classes to prepare for you to be a driver with a manner.... well it's mostly to prepare you for the written test OBVIOUSLY. Then you take the written AND road test to get the freaking permit. THEN you can drive on the normal road WITH instructor next to you. After like 20 hours of driving, you are finally allowed to take the road test to just GRADUATE the driving school. After you graduate, you have to take the final written test at your local police center or whatever and FINALLY GET THE LICENSE.






God, I hate writing so much. My head hurts now. Can I quit now? What? You haven't even talked about the camp part? UGHHHHH FINEEEEE. But now you get how lengthy it is.

SO the whole point of this camp is to do ALLLLLLL that stuff in only 2 weeks!!! You can indeed do all that in local driving school but it's harder to do, especially during summer vacation, since it could be crowded and harder to make reservation for each lesson/class. And in metro area like Tokyo, it's more expensive.

How expensive???


About.......Three F$%king Thousand Dollars.

I'm not exaggerating. And that amount is calculated as if 1 dollar is 100 yen. Right now 1dollar is about 80 yen or less so that would make it a little shy of $4,000.

Ridiculous right? Yeah I agree too. I'm sure there is a cheaper, more manual way to get a license on your own, but typically people go to schools and pay that much.

Boot camp is a little cheaper, since you usually go to country side and stay there fore 2 weeks and take classes intensively. They also provides you accommodation (usually business hotels) and  3 meals per day (through meal coupon kind of thing). Everything included it was $2400 per person ($1.00 = 100 Yen). Good deal right? Since it's a country side, it's quite nice to relax and people are generally nice... Some people say you can make friends with other camp kids. But being anti-social, I didn't make a single friend. Thank god I went with my sister.

I went to Niigata by the way.

No, no worries about radiation. well.... at least for now.

Did I get a license in the end???



YES.


So a piece of advice from me?

Get a driver's license elsewhere in the world and convert that into Japanese one.
You would save tons.

I should have f$%king gotten a license when I was in states...